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Nudists are weird. lisafwf@gmail.com

Tuesday, May 15, 2012

Current Fetish: Deceased Dentistry

While my estrogen levels are normally on a roller-coaster tycoon ride thanks to the trusty baby-preventers over at Bayer Incorporated, my creative juices have been experiencing a similar joyride for the past month, meaning that all I want to do is begin designing jewellery out of weird-ass materials that will hopefully upset my parents and frighten any improbable potential future in-laws from inviting me into the family.

And in the middle of all of this inventive turmoil, as if a direct sign from Jesus Christ himself, the ultimate symbol of resurrection, in comes the collection of Polly Van Der Glas with all of its commendable dedication to recycling. But this ain't the kind of recycling program you learned about in Girl Scouts. Try reducing, reusing, and recycling dead people's hair and teeth. And then fastening this same hair and teeth to your earlobes for the sake of personal adornment. Weird? Oh yes. Disrespectful? I imagine so. Illegal? One can only hope.

I don't know whether this is the dream of a taxidermist or of a recovering serial killer who has repressed his murderous tendencies for just a tad bit too long. Nor do I know whether I should be worried about the fact that I find these pieces neither creepy nor disturbing, and about what ominous insights that this may provide into my overall mental stability.

All I know is this: next pay cheque is going straight into a shovel and a map of Montreal's cemetery system...

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