flashing...lights...lights

Does anyone know if TLC's Little People, Big World is looking for new subjects to cast as their reality stars? An oddly random question, you may be thinking to yourself, but I am inquiring for several sufficiently valid reasons.

ONE: Papa Rollof is a jerk-face.

TWO: 17 year old, regular-sized Rollof drives far too many reasonable, female, adult viewers into suspecting themselves to be pedophiles.

THREE: I am vertically impaired.

FOUR: I just signed on with an acting/modeling agency.

FIVER: Combine reasons 4 and 5 and you will find that I was born for this role. 

And since the Man Repeller doesn't want me to frolic about the streets of NYC with her, what choice do I have for future employment? 

Such anxieties were racing through my brain last week after having signed an official contract, the legal contents of which I understood a whole lot of NADA, when, to my delight, I was informed that Algonquin College was on the lookout for a model of mixed-breed, and being the mutt that I am, I was cast. My mug will be splashed across their course calendar in the fall. Kudos to my bi-racially-sexually-hospitable ancestors. 

Plus, the big buck-aroos ain't bad either.

Here's one of the shots from the photo shoot. I am aware of this photo's cheese-factor and its resulting surplus of hilarity.

tooooooothy

And here's a peak at one of the shots for my portfolio.

Proof that little people can do big things too AND that they can hold up iPads for lengthy periods of time without collapsing under their substantial weight.