She's a super freak

Two nights ago, I went to the bar where I work  to take part in some extracurricular beverage consumption. I was sporting my favourite faux-fur vest, when I was greeted by my friend and chauffeur, Kevin who remarked, "You made me wait so that you could dress up like a bear?" And, the tyranny didn't stop there. Upon arrival, the first thing said to me by my manager was, "What the hell are you wearing?"

Logical Conclusion: I'm a freak.

Let us disect this topic a little further. According to Urban Dictionary,

	freak
	1.)A term that is a 'catch-all' for mainstream society to use to describe anyone who they may believe isn't mainstream. Such as mallgoths, punks, hardcore kids, emos, metalheads, goths and whatnot... pretty much used to describe anyone wearing black.  even worse are those who accept the term and call themselves a freak, such people are usually just mallgoth tools.

Previous Conclusion Amended: I am a mallgoth tool......well damn

ANYWAYS, in light of my attempts to whole-heartedly embrace my newly acquired status, I am now going to shamelessly encourage the following three, absolutely ridiculous, but entirely incredible trends.

1. The Fanny Pack is back betch:

Hallelujah, I knew this day would come.

Hermès

Dolce & Gabanna: Milan Fashion Week 2011

Dsquared: Fall/Winter 2011

2. Leopard-Print Soles:

The perfect trend for all those (like me) who possess a deeply-rooted distrust of the feline family. I mean  really, would your cat save your from a burning house? I think NOT.

Jeffrey Campbell

Andy from Style Scrapbook

Unknown

3. Flatforms:

Now before you delve feet-first (see that? Pun!) into this trend, know that wearing a flatform requires the sacrifice of any and all sex-appeal you may have once possessed. But c'mon people, it's Lent, sacrifices MUST be made.

Who What Wear

Join the ranks. Normal is boring. Let's all dress like freaks together. Hussah!